Keeper
by TheYoungTimpani
Summary: Set right after Judgment Day, Tony has a lot to figure out before he leaves. Set to the song Keeper by Yellowcard.


**Disclaimer:** One day, I might own all this...until then...meh.

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**Author's Note: **This is set the night after Judgment Day, if you don't want any spoilers, don't read it.

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**Keeper**

_I want to love, I want to leave_

_I want you to love me, I want you to leave me_

Tony sat on his couch and ran his hands through his hair.

He didn't know what he wanted anymore.

Used to, it was simple, all he wanted was booze and a one-night-stand...now...he didn't know.

_I want to stand where I can see_

_I'm watching you love me, I'm watching you leaving me now_

He knew that what had happened didn't help him any, if anything it mad his decisions harder to make.

Inside he knew that he wanted more out of life than what he had.

_I wish I could be somebody else_

_Wish I could see you in myself_

_Wish there was something inside me to keep you beside me_

But sometimes he doubted if he wanted anything at all.

He wished that he knew what he was thinking.

_Say what you really feel_

_You know I need something that's real_

_Wish there was something inside me to keep you beside me_

Now he didn't even know if he would have time to sort out what he needed to think about.

He was heading out to the U.S.S. Ronald Reagan tomorrow, what if he still wasn't sorted out by then?

_I want to know if I could be_

_Someone to turn to that could never hurt you_

He didn't know if he was even letting this get any farther.

What if this was real?

What if?

What if?

What if?

God! He needed to talk to her!

_But I know what you think of me_

_You had a break through and now I'm just bad news for you_

He wasn't even sure if she would want anything to do with him.

At one time there may have been a chance for something to happen, but now he didn't even know if there was a chance left.

_I wish I could be somebody else_

_Wish I could see you in myself_

_Wish there was something inside me to keep you beside me_

If only he had taken that chance when he had it!

If only he had acted on his feelings then!

If only...If only...

_Say what you really feel_

_You know I need something that's real_

_Wish there was something inside me to keep you beside me_

He couldn't let her go, that had already happened once...but was that real?

It doesn't matter anymore! He gave that one a chance to see if it was real, and he didn't even have any feelings when it started!  
This one was based on feelings, what could go wrong?!

_I should have told you everything_

_I never gave you anything_

Was he really going to let her go without telling her how he felt?

Was he really going to leave without letting he know how he felt?

_I should have told you everything_

_If I could give you anything_

_Then I would tell you everything_

He had to tell her, he had to tell her now!

He grabbed his coat and ran out the door.

_I wish I could be somebody else_

_Wish I could see you in myself_

_Wish there was something inside me to keep you beside me_

Was there really anything that he could say that would save this?

Well, it was worth a try, wasn't it?

_Say what you really feel_

_You know I need something that's real_

_Wish there was something inside me to keep you beside me_

He ran up to her door and knocked frantically, she pulled open the door and looked at him, confused.

"Tony, what are you-"

"Wait, please let me talk."

"Okay..." she said, even more confused.

_I should have told you everything_

"You know...I've been having these...feelings for a while now, but I've never knows exactly what to say...I mean, there's no easy way to say what I've gotta say to you..."

"Tony, what is it?"

_I should have told you everything_

"I should have told you this a long time ago...I really don't know how to say this...I'm not even sure that I know what I'm saying...I've never said this before and not have been...set up..."

"Tony, what are you saying?"

_I should have told you everything_

"I think I love you, Ziva."

"Tony...I..."

"Oh, oh...well, if you don't- I'm sorry, I just thought- Wow...wow, I feel like a total idiot..."

"What? Tony, no, its just that I...wasn't expecting this...now..."

"Hey, if you don't feel the same, I'll just-"

"No! No, Tony it's not that! I...just I didn't know what to say...Tony, I...I love you, too."

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**A.N.:** Hooray for fic 3 of my Pre-Premier Fic-A-Thon!

...This is really sappy, sappy...awww!

The song is _Keeper _by Yellowcard

Please review for Yellowcard (I owe them so much for writing such awesome songs).


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